sigh.

Well, no news or miscarriage yet.  I wasn't planning on writing anything at all, but I figured why not.  I've been really angry the past few days.  I'm sure it's hormones, but it seems to be getting worse.  Probably from speaking to the doctor yesterday--it sure didn't make things better.  I've been catty with some people at work that usually piss me off anyway, now I'm just starting to say things rather than blow it off as I always do.  Probably not the best thing since I'm trying to get in the 'circle' there so I can (eventually) buy that damn store.  I still want it--very much, but I am getting really sick of the run around from the current owner.  It's not like I'm really getting paid.  The only reason I've stuck around is because of the promised prospect of being soon to be owner.  I was even given a set date which would be tomorrow!  The owner and his wife asked me to coffee yesterday before my evening shift and we talked about the store.  What I think is going on is he wants to sell it ASAP (as he's said)--but hasn't been including her in what he's been telling me.  She was unaware of his continual promises and dates and talk of funds and he even told me to call the credit card machine company and switch the terminal in my name.  Though it was never said, you could tell she was completely in the dark because she kept shooting him blatantly obvious looks of 'wtf.'

So that's been another source of my being very pissy.  I'm sick of being used and led on.  Now the date is somewhere near February.  I flat out snapped at them and said I need an answer in 2 weeks or less because this is getting ridiculous.  The first time he offered me the store (2 months ago, maybe 3) I got a call from a job that I had applied to a while ago for an interview.  I politely turned it down since I didn't want to waste their time, as I was supposed to pay him for the store the following day.  I hadn't mentioned this to either of them until yesterday at coffee.  I said I've been more than patient, more than understanding, and I've stuck around only to be strung along and taken advantage of.  Their main 'thing' is that the owner (the husband) has been sober a couple few years and they feel working the store helps to keep him sober.  I called them out on that, too.  He hasn't worked a day, well maybe a day in the past 2 months.  They just came back from a 3 week stint at their house up north, and are leaving Saturday to spend some time at their timeshare in CO.  I mean, c'mon.  Clearly, this store isn't doing anything for your sobriety.  And even if it were, then it's time to get sober on your own instead of using a convenience store in the rehab you got sober in as a big ol' crutch.  Am I right??

I was very firm with them, and it took them by surprise.  I'm a very nice person, very accommodating especially for those I work for and with.  Well eff that.  I feel the need to be appreciated and respected (fancy that!).  I said I was still interested in the store, but I don't trust anything anymore with good reason, and I won't until we have signed the papers, money has exchanged hands and I have the keys.  I said all of this very nicely, just plain and honest.  They understood, or at least said so.   I said I'm clearly not working here for the money, and I need to start making some real money for my family.  If you're still undecided in 2 weeks I will be drastically cutting my availability and looking for work elsewhere.  I will still be interested when you're ready to sell the store, I just can't afford to waste my time.

Some of you might say I'm not playing my cards right but I actually have the upper hand.  I work twice a day, seven days a week.  On most days it's 12:00p-1:00p, go home and come back 5:00p-7:00p. Visitation days and it's hours are all over the board.  Example: Wednesdays are 12:00p-1:00p. Then 3:30p-6:00p.  I can't be open (rehab policy) while they are in group classes.  They have group from 6:00p-7:00p.  So, it isn't worth me going home and driving right back (it takes 20-30 minutes one way from home to work) so I have to sit and read or pick my nose for that hour they are in group.  Then, I'm open from 7:00p-7:15p for their 'between meeting break.' They have another meeting from 7:00/7:15-8:00.  I then work from 8:00-9:00p.  For all the breaks, I do not get paid.  But essentially, I work from 12:00p to 9:00p and am paid for a little less than 5 hours or there abouts. Tell me this.  Where are you going to find a moron to work these hours other than myself? You aren't.  I work them, because there was a bigger goal in sight: owning the store December 1st.

The staff and the owner of the rehab love me and constantly ask when I'm taking over the store.  My bosses can't deny that, they know it very well.  They've even had phone calls about it! People calling to say what a wonderful job I'm doing and how much they love having me there.  Which I'm sure just chaps his hide, but hey.. it's true.  I have been doing my darndest to be perceived as just that: The most awesomest store-runner in the world.

Kind of an off-topic post for me I suppose.  But, with the unfortunate baby news.. I don't think we will be TTC for months so get used to my boring, day to day posts.  I have to do something to keep what sanity I have left hanging around, right?

[Oh! And as if this wasn't long enough to begin with.  Another peeve.  Yesterday, I stayed a little later than 8 at work.  Power went out right when I left.  I knew the fridge and the long freezer would be fine, etc. So I left. I had promised to make some candied pecans for a girl at work.  She paid me $15 for them.  I get the pecans for $7 so it was almost worth it.  Went to the store on the way home, picked up dinner since it was late and I didn't want to cook and got home about 9:00. Mixed up the pecans and threw them in the oven.  As I was putting them in the oven, I get  call on my cell phone.  The place that I work at doesn't have my phone number, as in.. the actual rehab.  But I had their number in my phone for emergencies and what not.  So it came up on my phone as the rehab.  What the heck? I answer.  It's the girl I'm making the nuts for.  She said that they had called my boss and he didn't pick up repeatedly (and you know darn well he has their number in his phone--BOTH of his phones--the two they called)--so we thought we'd try you.  The ice cream freezer has been making a TERRIBLE noise every since the power went back on about 20-30 minutes ago.  You can hear it all the way down the hall.  So I'm pissed.  As I mentioned, takes 20 minutes to get to work and it's now after 9p.  I won't be home until 10 at the latest. Not to mention... Sebastian now has to stir the nuts every 15 minutes for an hour until they are done. The girl went on a break, and in the meantime the noise has stopped. No one bothers to call me of course.  I get there, everything is fine.  I turn around, come home.  Nuts are burnt.  Not mad at the hubby, it wasn't his task.. but I now have to get more nuts and eggs as I used the last of them on the burnt batch.  I'm now really mad.  If the girl hadn't paid me, and hadn't been taking 3 days off after the next day--I would have waited until another day for sure.  Go to store again.  Get nuts and eggs. Talk to Ali on the phone.  Go home, make nuts. Cook for an hour. Bed by 1:30a.  Bring nuts to work next day (today) in a quart sized ziplock with the girls name written in bold, black sharpie plainly across the front of the bag.  Hand it to administrator and say who they're for.  Go to work. Go home, go back to work.. and run into the nut-girl.  She asks for them.  I say they are in the office?  Nope, not there.  Calls administrator.  She ate them. I am going to reduce myself to the very cliche acronym of: FML.]