i love this blog AWARD!!

Wow!! How cool am I? Apparently, one person thinks I'm just about as neat as I think she is!! A fellow PCOSer and fellow PCOSesque blogger (check her out here !!) awarded me a nifty little award called: I Love This Blog Award (dang, that's a lot of 'award' mentioned in a short amount of space)!!  I'm so very honored, surprised and totally excited! So thank you so, so much! :)

I went back and forth and back and forth again, flip-flopping on what sort of blog I wanted in the beginning.  I'm glad I chose to (typically) write about PCOS and it's crappy way of trying to take over your life.  I, too (like the girl who awarded me) find some kind of solstice in the fact that we are a strong network of not so out of the ordinary girls, and even though I haven't met a lot of people who read this blog it still makes me feel good to know there are other PCOSers out there reading my writing (silly as it may be) and maybe feeling a bit better about their own situation or at least relating to mine! When first started checking out PCOS online I came across a message board called SoulCysters.  First off, it's a damn cute name.  But I really liked the implication of sister. It makes me feel so much stronger.

So this is how the award works:

1. Thank and link back to the person who gave you this award.
2.  Share 7 things about yourself.
3.  Award some recently discovered bloggers that are deserving.
4.  Contact those bloggers and let them know about the award!

7 things about ME:

1.  When I put lotion on my arms, I can't just rub it around until it's absorbed.  I hardly have any arm hair, but the hair that is there can't be swirled around haphazardly.  It has to lay down, and in the same direction. OCD, I suppose? :\
2.  I've never owned an automatic vehicle and it scares me to think of driving one.  I screech around corners because I'm not used to braking heavily (normally, I'd just downshift!)
3.  I sometimes have conversations with my dog when no one is home?
4.  I love to knit, but I know only one stitch, can't 'finish off' a row, and have no idea how to make anything.
5.  After watching karate/hand to hand combat movies--either in the theater or home--I tend to feel slightly empowered after watching it.  Like I somehow just learned some gnarly kung fu and could actually put it to use.  I usually throw a few mock punches at whoever I'm with in the theater (i.e: Sebastian) and he admittedly has the same problem of feeling much cooler than he is after watching these movies.  So, we joke around and kick and punch out way out of the theater and into the car: but really... we feel uber cool when we do it.
6.  Something that makes me more excited than it should: the idea of being able to spend an enormous amount of money (limitless!!) on restocking my entire kitchen.  And remodeling it so it can hold way too much in the way of gadgets and food, glorious food! Not packaged things, but a goal of mine is to be able to make anything.. literally anything.. and not have to go to the store and buy 95% of the meal.  I want tubs of different grains and flours.. the works.  It makes me smile and brings a tear to my eye just thinking about it.
7.  Damn, 7 things aint easy.. that's for sure.  Not sure if this qualifies but, I thoroughly enjoy my coffee (and tea for that matter) with cream and sugar and black.  It flip flops each day.  I personally don't think it's odd at all, but other than the hubby I've never met anyone that enjoyed both equally.  You're usually one or the other, apparently.

Well.. this shall conclude my Sunday morning post!! Thanks again for reading, and thank you for the award!!! I feel like a star....

;) 

fertile myrtles everywhere!

This post title was brought on by a fellow PCOS blogger bud's recent post... it's true, too.  Maybe it's a bit like buying a new car.  I bet you never noticed so many of whatever you drive--until after you'd bought it..

 Being faced with fertility issues, I think it's almost instinctual to notice all the pregnant people from you group of close friends, extended friends on ol' Facebook, to strangers on the street.  You want to scowl and maybe throw something at them.  At least I find I do sometimes.  Maybe even run up and kick them (lightly?) in the shins and storm off.  As if it's somehow someone else's fault I have difficulty conceiving.  I know it's irrational, and for the most part I am genuinely happy for those that are currently pregnant or new parents.  I suppose I'm just jealous that I'm not.

I know I shouldn't feel the way I do and that's why I don't say anything (or kick strangers in the shins).  I mentioned on a post (on that same PCOS blogger bud's recent post) earlier that at work this week I had said my stomach hurt and I was just really tired, when a co-worker asked how I was.  There were three people there and one said 'Oh! You must be pregnant!' the second said 'Yeah! You've been married a while.. you should be pregnant!!' the third agreed.  My jaw almost hit the floor. How rude, I thought.  But, was it really? I mean.. I would never say anything like that to anyone. Just not knowing their situation, from situations like mine to maybe just not wanting children.  I can also safely say that even before I knew I had PCOS, I never said things like that.  Maybe my feelings on it have deepened a bit, but even still.. I never pried into personal subjects like that with people, especially people I hardly know. And when I say 'co-workers'.. I mean people I rarely see and/or interact with. Of course I didn't say anything, because I clearly knew they didn't do it maliciously.. but I do wish people would have more sensitivity when talking about things like that.  Half of me wanted to be blatantly honest and laugh and say, 'Oh no.. that's nearly impossible.  I can't have children without assisted reproduction and an endocrinologist.  Besides, I had a miscarriage in December.. so we can't start a cycle until my body recovers from that!' Oy vey.  I just wish people would think sometimes, yanno?

On that note.. that's pretty much it around here.  I know I've said it a million times, but I'm saying it again: I will be on my second month of BC pills since the MC.. starting Thursday.  I will have to get a refill in a couple months, I think.  I want to take time off (a) to see WTF is going on with the store, (b) to give my body 'time' to recover from the MC and to really get used to the Metformin (which should reduce my MC rate dramatically: to that of a 'normal' woman), and (c) I want to lose as much weight as I can.. even if I don't need to lose a ton.  I can't really gain more than 15 pounds when I get pregnant, and I have not... and I mean NOT been on a low carb 'diet.' At all! And I'm supposed to be watching carbs/sugar.  So, I need to get that whole thing on track.. pronto.  I would think about 5 months out from here would be the best time to try again.  My body would be in sync with my PCOS pills, I could lose 25-30 pounds and really work on a lower carb and sugar lifestyle to safeguard against gestational diabetes.  Ugh. No bueno..


Well kiddos.. that's it for now.  I hope this post finds all of you happy and healthy. Ciao!