last day/dose of clomid!

I was feeling overly excited on account of the fact I've had very little side effects from the Clomid.  Then I went online and found that most women have side effects (mostly hot flashes) after they stop Clomid. Super!

I planned a 'weekend getaway' this weekend, now let's just hope I don't have insane mood swings and hot flashes, blurred vision, bloating and gas!!

I have to go into work tonight, too.  Not that I mind.. but I feel like my time could be better spent packing.  Oh, one thing I've noticed (and read online after noticing) I've been extremely exhausted.  Like, ran over by a freight train after running a marathon kind of exhausted.  I generally have a lot going on, so I'm not always 'peppy' and awake, but I'm never this tired. I need to take naps between my errands instead of running them all at once--no joke! So I suppose that's an unwanted side effect. Other than that though, honestly no complaints.. yet!

I'll post after our appointment on the 1st, Monday and let you all know how the eggs are progressing!

Clomid, Cycle Day 4-CD 8

After getting mildly chewed out by sweet lil' Dr. Chen, I had my ultrasound to check egg development.  Apparently, I should have called her as she would have preferred to start me on Clomid Saturday as opposed to today (Monday).  Lucky for us, Clomid isn't as time specific as the injectable fertility meds are, so we should be just fine. My eggs look fine and dandy, which is nice!

The jist: I will be on a very high dosage of Clomid for 4 days. 150mg daily. Most women start on 50mg daily.  I really love how aggressive she is in fertility.  The way she (and I) sees it, there is no sense in doing 3 or 4 rounds of Clomid at 50 mg increments, why not start at the top? Then you know if it will (or won't) work and what the next step will be if needed.  I do feel for Sebastian though. With higher doses of Clomid, women tend to experience serious mood swings and hot flashes. Good times. ;)

So, I will stop the Clomid CD 8, which is the 29th of October. She suspects I will have a mature egg (or eggs) on November 1st (our anniversary!)--I have an ultrasound appointment on the 1st at 8:30a to check on our lil' eggies.  If/when the egg/s are ready to go, I will then get a 'trigger shot' to release it.  Then I believe the IUI would follow shortly after.  During the egg-check appointment, she will also check my uterine lining.  Clomid can make the lining thin/weak and if it looks to be the case for me, she will start me on a medication to remedy that (can't remember the name, but it's 2x a day).  Hopefully all is well, the less meds the better I'm thinking!

So, transvag ultrasound was fine.  No pain, nothing. Which is great, since I'll have another one a week from now.  We're going away for the weekend to celebrate our anniversary early since it's on a Monday. Kind of doubly exciting seeing as how my uterus and his.. parts... will be on-call the next couple weeks or more.  So it will be nice to have some time to get away and be alone and relax.

It's becoming more and more real to me that we just might be pregnant this time next month. For what a 'process' this has been, it's actually going really, really fast.  We're very excited! :)

The Period!

All of my loyal man-readers.. stop here. You were warned.

My period showed up just after office hours on the last day of the work week. AKA Friday at 7:00pm.  If you remember, I was supposed to call the office right when I get my period and schedule an ultrasound for no more than 3 days after the start of my period. Of course, I will be going in Monday morning. Might just show up! Only problem being, while on this awful birth control I have had really heavy 3 day periods. I did however stop my BC pills, but it wasn't more than 5 days ago--so if this is a 3 day period, might not be here Monday!! Grr. I assume this 'while you're menstrating transvaginal ultrasound' BS is somewhat of an important step in this whole process of creating children.. so I will be a little ticked off if we have to start over next month. I think this is the one time in my life I'm hoping for a long, heavy period that lasts through the weekend. Ha!

Keep you posted after the ultrasound Monday.

She'll let me make payments!

So! Day one of no BC. I'm already getting cramps. So weird how fast it works on me. Anywho, we were trying to think of ways to come up with the $800 for this cycle, and we're great with saving money in general but we had very little time to come up with darn near $1000. $800 may as well be $1000 in my book. I think I had my last appointment and pap about a week ago. Actually.. exactly a week ago today. So I essentially had to come up with $780.00 in a week, if I get my period tomorrow or Thursday.  Knowing it's only been a week actually makes me feel a bit better about being stressed on where this money is coming from.  I called the office and talked to someone in billing. I got them (the Dr had mentioned they'd made slight payment arrangements for people in the past) to take two payments of $390.  One the first day or second day of my period/ultra sound and the next payment the day of the IUI.  Seems fair.  It's hard for them to take payments because if someone defaults on their payments, they are left with zero money since insurance doesn't cover fertility procedures.  If someone were to default in the OBGYN sense, at least they'd have something from billing the insurance.  Apparently, when she used to just bill you for her fertility services, people would get pregnant and then just find another OB so they didn't have to pay.  How awful!  So I understand.. and we'll be able to swing it.  Fingers crossed it works this cycle though, as I mentioned the next is $980, but includes the injectable meds. Still, not incredibly easy to come up with for us these days, but I'm sure we'll figure it out and cross that bridge if/when we get there.

Kind of random but the people I work with/for also have fertility problems.  She doesn't have PCOS, she has unexplained infertility.. which personally, I think is even more frustrating.  When I was originally diagnosed with NOT having PCOS a year ago, I was so incredibly frustrated. I didn't want it or any other real problem of course, but not knowing what the problem is, well that's just an awful feeling. You can't explore homeopathic remedies, you can't take meds that you know will benefit you.  The poor thing. They've done cycle after cycle of IVF with no success.  No miscarriages either, which is actually disheartening because at least with a miscarriage, you know you're able to get pregnant.  I think they have just a few embryos left and are trying to figure out what to do with them.  She's just over 40 now I think, so her eggs that she has now are most likely not viable. Her embryos are from when she was 38, I believe (and they are healthy).  I've suggested (nicely) maybe trying surrogacy, as her eggs are great, the embryos they have ready to go are perfect.. and they so desperately want a child.  I think she's actually thinking about it.  Either way it's really nice having someone who understands what you're going through, and if I ever need to run to the Dr,  it's never a big deal at all. So that's nice. :)

Okay kiddies.  Talk soon.  Oh. And if we conceive this cycle, our estimated due date would fall on about July 28th.  Yay for being pregnant during the summer!! Oy vey.. ;)

2 Days left of Birth Control pills! :D

*EDIT*[Rather than go back through and adjust.. I made a mistake! Today (Monday) is my last day on BC pills. Took the last pill this morning. So I expect my cycle to start Wednesday, which will still put me at Thursday or Friday for my first ultrasound!]

Typically, I always seem to update after a procedure or a Dr visit when things are still fresh in my head--but I thought I'd switch it up a bit and just update all two of my followers (love you guys!!) on what's swimming around in my head! So, I have 5 'active' BC pills left, my Dr told me I could skip the last three if I wanted (I want, I want!) and just go off of it then. So that leaves, what? Monday and Tuesday! And then the waiting game for the period. Which, I skipped ONE day previously and started very lightly spotting, breast tenderness, etc etc.. all the normal period woes.  So I'm expecting that wait to be less than 2 days.  Which means, first ultrasound in about 4 days! Thursday or Friday, I'm guessing.  I forget the reason, something to do with follicles, why I have to have a transvaginal ultrasound while on my period.  Other than to make me feel completely uncomfortable! You'd figure by now it wouldn't be an issue.  But, it sounds terrible. The ultrasound isn't bad at all, I had one my first visit to diagnose the PCOS.  Oh well. As a friend would say, we're doing this for our little miracle(s)! I'll keep you updated, as I'm sure you're just dying to know when I start my period. Ciao!

Follow-up w/Dr Chen

Today I went in to see Dr Chen to go over my HSG results (and, to throw in a papsmear). I already knew that they were normal (HSG) as the Doctor that performed the test informed me of such right after! But it was nice to see the written report and to hear it from her, and to be able to spend a little more time talking about it. No tumors, both tubes were clear, no defects, no abnormalities involving the uterus or endometrial cavity. Yay? Yay!

Finally got copies of mine and hubby's blood work results.  We knew everything was alright, but again.. nice to go over in detail and to receive copies for our medical files here at home.  No STDs, no AIDS, I'm not a cystic fibrosis carrier, blood sugar is great, immune to chicken pox, I'm type O-Positive (thought it was negative all these years), insulin of course was 25.3 which is high on account of my PCOS.  Hubby just had a 'infertility ID screen'--which isn't as in depth as mine was so there isn't too much to report on, but semen analysis and STD/HIV panel was all perfect. So we've been COMPLETELY cleared to get crackin'. We're totally healthy!

So, remember how I had thought that I was going to have to finish out my BC pills? Well, she said just to do it for another week.. which means, our first cycle of TTC (trying to conceive) is in ..... deeeep breath... 2  and a half weeks there abouts. AHH! I'm so excited/nervous/scared/and more excited than anything.

The technical mumbo jumbo is as follows. Well, infertility isn't considered a 'medical necessity' so 99% of insurances (and all insurances in the state of CA) do not cover any fertility treatments.  I love my RE (reproductive endocrinologist), and her prices are in the normal range. It will cost us about $800.00 per cycle, at least the first cycle (month 1) because we will be using Clomid (cheaper than other options) to induce ovulation. Not cheap, but not as bad as it could be.. I suppose. This includes multiple ultrasounds/office visits--doesn't include the Clomid, though it's cheap @ Walmart pharmacy--and one IUI (intrauterine insemination).  Dr Chen's goal, as well as our goal, is to get this knocked out (and me knocked up!) as quickly as possible; the less cycles the better. A couple few at MOST. We're really praying/hoping this will work on the first cycle. The odds aren't really against us, but they aren't exactly cheering us along and showing us the way, either.  About 25% of the time, Clomid does not work. It's not a small percentage, but it isn't too discouraging. Some women, most actually, their Drs put them on cycle after cycle of Clomid.  Dr Chen and I agreed wholeheartedly that the longer something like this drags out when a medicine clearly isn't working with your body, the harder and more discouraging this will be on you, your husband, your job, your life in general and even your marriage.  An oxymoron, seeing as how you are creating a life and preparing for the happiest time of your lives together.

If the Clomid doesn't work in the first cycle, we will keep everything else the same (multiple ultrasounds/visits, IUI), but instead of the Clomid we will use an injectable ovulation medication: a trigger shot. On both cycles, we will be doing the IUI as well as the ol' fashioned way because Clomid and fertility drugs in general tend to thicken cervical mucus apparently, and makes it harder for sperm to find it's way. With the IUI, obviously, it has no problem getting to the uterus.  We might be successful with or without the IUIs, but in an effort to give ourselves the best odds, we've opted for doing that right from the start. The trigger shot 'package' is just about $1000.00 per cycle, $200 more than the Clomid package. This is the total cost per cycle, so you can see where this could get expensive...REALLY expensive if you weren't aggressive with it and just did cycle after cycle after cycle.

Oh, and since I've met my deductible with our HealthNet PPO/Insurance.. my prescriptions have been free for the last 3 months.  I was using Nature Made prenatal multi's + DHA (200mg of DHA in the vitamin), which were typically $18.99 a bottle. For a months supply. Not too bad, but hey.. if I can get pharmaceutical grade vitamins for free.. why not?! So I asked for a prescription and she said sure, wrote me one, and added that they didn't previously make (in the pharmacy) a prenatal with DHA in it. The ones she prescribed are called CitraNatal90DHA. They come in blister packs in the box and you take two gels a day, that look different so I assume this one doesn't have the DHA in the vitamin, it's separate.  I was just reading the box to get the name and noticed '..Gentle calcium citrate and dual iron, plus a stool softener...' Niiiiice.

I'll keep you updated! Next post will be how great or how not-so-great the new vitamins are. Not thrilled with the 'stool softening' bit on account of my taking Metformin 2x a day. G'head. Google Metformin side effects. You'll figure it out. Apparently, the new vits are amazing, according to Dr Chen and my pharmacist. So we'll see! The post after that one will be.... about... TTC, Cycle 1! Besos!

Mission HSG COMPLETE!

So! The dreaded HSG... not so bad!! What a sigh of relief! I had myself worked up over something that turned out to be much less painful than I ever anticipated.

 I had this nerve testing done once, I had made the mistake of looking online and seeing others reactions to the test: ALL negative. In fact, just like the HSG, the most common response, and I quote, was: I WILL NEVER, EVER have this test done again! And, I wholeheartedly agreed with that statement for the nerve testing. I was in tears. Not sobbing, just tears flowing freely down my face. It was terrible, terrible pain.

When I 'researched' the HSG, I went online and watched hours of youtube videos of women, also in tears, saying just how terrible the HSG was. I almost cried watching!! I knew I had to do it, but man.. did I want to? HECK no, I didn't.  A friend of mine said "Just remember what you're doing this FOR. Don't lose sight of that." And, honestly.. that's the only thing that got me in there. I have terrible anxiety, and I worked myself into a frenzy over this thing.

I do have a high tolerance for pain. But, it wasn't painful at all. It was uncomfortable. At times, pretty uncomfortable. That second statement is only true because apparently my uterus isn't tilted, but it's hard to get ahold of. It's aimed slightly backward. Dang uterus. So it was the searching for my uterus that was the most uncomfortable, not the filling of it.

I did it! It's done. I have an appointment to see Dr. Chen next Tuesday.  I have been on birth control pills to regulate my absent period for 1 month, just started the first week of my second pack. I believe I have 1 or two refills left on it, but I'm not entirely sure how long she wants me on them. Who knows! I could start Clomid and injections next week! Wishful thinking, I'm sure.. but.. :)